#truth

Recently, I saw a post, on my Facebook wall, that had the tagline #truth. It struck me as odd, because it was a pretty passive aggressive and slightly rude…however this is what this person wanted to call their “truth”…

It made me think about the word “truth” and what it means to me…

#truth: my friends & family

I will always put the needs and best interests of my kids first. Some may call me a “slave to a schedule” but what I have learned (and what has been proven by people with actual medical degrees and a lot of other degrees attached to their name…) is that kids thrive with a schedule, structure and SLEEP! I refuse to jeopardize their health, well being or my sanity to have them attend a birthday party, etc. I can put up with the eye rolls, the judgement, the talking behind my back because I am an adult…and usually those comments are coming from people who still have a whole lotta growing up to do!

When it comes to my family, I am fiercely loyal. Also, family is not just those that I share DNA with. Having lived away from my parents and brother for 12 years, I learned that family is also those friends that become closer to you than the word “friend” quantifies them for. One of my dear friends, Robyn, once told me that when it came to my friends, I was like a Momma bear and when someone messed with one of my “cubs” the claws came out…and you did not want to be on the other side of that paw. I took that as one of the highest compliments ever.

I am truly blessed to have the people in my life that I call friends and while life and travel has taken me from one end of this country and back to Thunder Bay again, and it’s hard to leave friends behind…I know that in every sense of the word they are still beside me.

#truth: Mommy wars 

As stated above, I love my kids and Evan and I have chosen to raise them a certain way. So far it’s working well for us. Although we are about to have a “threenager” in the house, so I will keep you posted. However, our way of life is not for everyone…AND THAT’S OK! I didn’t realize that there was so much judgement in the “mommy” world until more recently. I had no idea that in a community that is bonded by such a special reason (our kids) would be so f’ing brutal with each other.

Don’t want to breastfeed. Knock yourself out. I have breastfed and used formula and my kids are ok.

Don’t want to let your kids cry it out. Awesome. We sleep trained Audrey and plan to soon with Ben.

Prefer to wear your baby than push them in a stroller. I am a recent baby wearing convert and love my Ergo.

Co-sleeping, attachment, Tiger Mom? Thumbs up…whatever works for you.

What I think those that participate in Mommy wars don’t get is…we are ALL IN THE WEEDS…why not just smile and offer each other a high five, a hug or maybe a glass of wine. Anyone who thinks that they can do this better than someone else is doomed to be alone…and from my experience, other Mom’s are allies that you not only want…you NEED!

The one caveat that I will add to this is about immunizations. To me…there is NO excuse for not getting your child immunized and I will judge you and keep my children away from you….this meme says it all…

 

#truth: sweat

I like to sweat. I like to run and workout. I have done some of my best thinking, writing and problem solving while sweat is stinging my eyes. I workout because I like the way I feel after (runners high ls real!) and I also workout because I refuse to stop drinking wine or eating my Mother’s baking.

#truth: my postpartum body

The recent Dove commercial, which talks about self-hate thoughts that women have about their bodies really hits home. There are very few days that I don’t look at my body and think that there is something that could be tighter, smaller/larger, less saggy, more toned, etc. I am trying my best to remind myself that this made, carried and delivered (drug free to my chagrin…) two beautiful babies. This is the body that they know and love. There is no judgement in their eyes. They crawl onto it, snuggle against it and cover me in kisses and hugs. I might not it like some days…but this body is loved.

 

#truth: love

Another friend recently posted on Facebook “life is hard. love your people harder”. Totally agree.

Father knows best…

I wonder who thought that having Father’s Day after Mother’s Day was a good idea….not that I think that it’s a bad idea, but if you drop the ball on Mother’s Day, you are pretty much setting yourself up for a lump of coal in your Father’s Day stocking. However, if you pull out all the stops and create an amazing Mother’s Day experience, you are setting yourself up for an awesome day. Especially because most Mom’s that I know go out of their way to one up and out do what their husband’s do…it’s just in our nature….

I had a fantastic Mother’s Day…so yes…I did what I could to out-do Evan!

He also set the the bar really high, he asked for brown socks…

So, it wasn’t hard to high jump that one and knock it out of the park!

We (Audrey and I )first created a photobook on Shutterfly (which was SUPPOSED to show up on time…but has yet to arrive…grrrr…) which included photos of Audrey and Evan and will hopefully be a bit of a “brag” book for him. We also got him some fun Dad themed books, like Dr. Seuss’ Hop on Pop and Mercer Meyer’s “Just me and my Dad”. We are also toying with the idea of letting him sleep in…but since it’s the weekend…and my only time to really pass the 6am wake up call onto him…I doubt that that will happen. (Side note…yes…Audrey’s new wake up time, for the last few days has been 6am. That, along with this new screeeeeeeching sound she makes is something that I hope she forgets very soon!)

As new parents, we’re still eager to spend time with our child on Mother and Father’s Day, versus some of our friends, etc. who seek alone time and activities that allow them to have a break from their children on these special days. I wonder when that will change for us….?? I will say that while I am feeling more confident about being away from Audrey, I am still not ready to spend a lot of time away from her…especially if I don’t have a pump with me! However, I will throw it out there that if next year for Mother’s Day I am sent away to a spa or something spa-like…I will definitely ensure that I allow Evan to sleep in!

Oh…and he’ll got his brown socks too!

Getting back on the horse…if the horse is a pair of running shoes…

During our New Years Eve festivities this year (or rather “last year” as it was December 31st, 2o12 when we had the conversation) a friends boyfriend asked each of what goals we had for 2013. At that point I was 9 months pregnant and pretty much my only goal was being able to tie my own shoes again, sleep on my stomach and have a glass of (guilt free) champagne…

However, when pressed for more “long term” goals, I stated that I wanted to run a half-marathon.

Silly Emily…

In my pregnant state I lamented the fact that it had been almost 5 years since I had run more than a 10k and that before that I had been knocking off 4-5 half marathons a year. Soooo…I thought that it would be a nice goal to get back into long distance running and since I would have ALL THIS SPARE TIME, it would be a piece of cake to train and accomplish this goal.

Silly, stupid, pre-motherhood notions…

Soooo….after going through labour and delivery, and realizing how much time, energy and did I mention time that an almost 5 month old requires, I have adjusted my goal. It is starting with a 5k on June 23rd and I am hoping to be able to do the Toronto Zoo Run in September…I might do the 10k and I might just opt to do the 5k pushing the jogging stroller…that would be harder than a 10k I figure anyways!  That’s it. Short and sweet and totally doable…I hope.

Getting back into running was a stressful thing for me, which was odd, as running was something that had always come quite naturally to me and something that I used to deal with stress. It has taken me a long time to realize that my body went through a pretty major trauma, and I had a fairly easy and uncomplicated labour and delivery. It has also taken me awhile to recognize that my level of athletic ability has changed and it’s not as simple as just strapping on the old running shoes and hitting the pavement.  My first few runs, postpartum, were some of the most humbling experiences of my life. I remember doing a simple loop around our neighbourhood…maybe 1km…at about 6 weeks postpartum, and I came back feeling like I had just run for an hour.

My body is slowly remembering what it’s like to do this thing called running, and while I am feeling more and more confident everyday about this, I know that I need to be realistic and patient with myself.

Any other Mom’s out there dealing with “postpartum patience” issues?

 

A Pregnant Pause…

This past Friday was International Women’s Day…but more importantly in our house it was Audrey’s 2 month birthday!

Last year, I wrote about some of  my favourite women…a recap HERE.

This year, I have a more general call to action for women…let’s be nicer to each other, OK?

Why am I looking for a group hug…here’s the story.

As mentioned (several times) before, I like to Google, look up information and keep in the loop on the latest stuff when it comes to pregnancy and parenting. Good or bad…this is my reality. Recently I found a blog called Pregnant Chicken, which allowed mothers and mothers-to-be to ask questions an get others to offer advice, support and of course judgement. I was amazed and appalled that when a women is facing serious situations, such as complications with a pregnancy or a challenging parenting moment, that others would take the time to call her names or make her feel like she is doing something incredibly damaging to her child.

Ladies, why can’t we all just get along?

Why, when a women is putting herself out there, asking for help or support would you take the time to write something negative? She’s obviously reaching out because she NEEDS help…so why instead of a life preserver do you offer a brick?

I have only been pregnant once and my daughter is only 2 months old, but anytime I can offer advice, support and help clear away some of the uncertainty that can come with pregnancy and parenting, I do. I would never pass judgement on someones decision to do or not do something, because the last time I checked, these babies don’t come with a manual!

SO…in conclusion…let’s not just celebrate women on International Women’s Day, but everyday…because without us, this world would be a lot less populated and a WHOLE lot less cute…

Yes…even at this decibel…she is adorable!